Relics of Old Decency

You see the good Irish linen napkins here? These are relics of old decency. But what are relics of old decency? They appear in Ulysses:   But when my mother so describes her napkins she is quoting her father, and he, although roughly contemporary with Joyce, was a minister of the Reformed Presbyterian Church and on […]

The 9th/12th Royal Lancers

are back from Afghanistan.    

Tales of My Landlady

A Novel by Jedediah Cleishbotham. Discovered in several instalments in May and June 2013. Set in Oxfordshire, Glasgow, Edinburgh, Inverness and Orkney. Chapter One It was near the end of the month of May, 20—, when a Scottish gentlewoman, who had just taken leave of absence from her duties in the south, made use of […]

In which I buy bands

‘In the Cathedral we wear bands.’ I have been measured for a cassock. Two albs are being constructed according to the Cathedral’s unique design, possibly an inheritance of the local engineering traditions. Now I must find bands. I go to Oxford. In the first shop, where I am addressed as ‘madam’, the very helpful man […]

An Assemblage of Clergy

Herne the Shopkeeper 4 October 2010 The town of Windsor is entirely devoted, heart and soul, hook, line and sinker, to genteel commerce. I have never seen so many posh teashops. I have never been offered so many florally-sprigged household utensils for sale. I could be clothed head to foot in drab green waxed cotton. […]

Not A Fishing Hotel

‘Apart from the difficulty of the journey itself to Grafenberg, close to the Polish border, patients at Priessnitz’s new establishment were subjected to spartan bedrooms whose windows were kept wide open to the winter night. You were woken at four o’clock in the morning and wrapped from neck to toe in wet linen. Thus mummified, […]